Why Failure Does Not Mean You Have to Give Up

Why Failure Does Not Mean You Have to Give Up

By Mark Wager

This week, I want to share with you the inspiring story of Adrian McKinty. If his name doesn’t immediately ring a bell, that’s understandable, but his journey holds relevance for anyone who’s faced setbacks in life. McKinty’s story offers hope and insight into the nature of perseverance, especially in moments when giving up feels like the only option.

Adrian McKinty, an author from Northern Ireland, was no stranger to adversity. He won a scholarship to study politics and philosophy at the University of Oxford, a prestigious achievement by any standard. After graduating, he took on a range of jobs—security guard, librarian, rugby coach—while pursuing his true passion: writing.

The writing world is famously competitive. As someone who has coached writers, I understand just how tough the industry can be. McKinty succeeded in getting several novels published, each met with critical acclaim and even winning awards. However, critical success didn’t translate into financial stability. Despite his talent, the books didn’t sell well, and McKinty found himself struggling to support his wife and two children. To make ends meet, he worked extra jobs in construction and as an Uber driver. Even though the financial strain weighed heavily on him, he never stopped believing in his ability. Yet no matter how hard he worked, the breakthrough he longed for never materialised. After years of trying, McKinty finally reached his breaking point. Evicted from his home, he made the heart-wrenching decision to quit writing.

This turning point could have marked the end of McKinty’s story, but life had other plans. After quitting, McKinty wrote a heartfelt letter to the crime novelist Don Winslow, expressing his frustrations and sense of defeat. Winslow, moved by McKinty’s honesty and resilience, connected him with his agent, Shane Salerno. Salerno encouraged McKinty to give writing one last shot and even secured him an advance, enabling him to quit Uber driving and focus entirely on writing a final novel. With this newfound support, McKinty poured his efforts into what he thought might be his last attempt.

That novel was The Chain, which has since become an international bestseller, published in over 20 countries. Recently, Universal Pictures signed a seven-figure deal to turn The Chain into a movie, directed by Edgar Wright, the acclaimed director of Baby Driver and Shaun of the Dead. McKinty’s story is a testament to the power of perseverance, the impact of reaching out for support, and the unpredictable nature of success.

Why Failure Feels So Final

One of the reasons McKinty’s story resonates so deeply is that we’ve all been there, standing on the brink of failure, wondering if it’s time to give up. For many, failure feels like an ending. It’s demoralising, especially when you’ve invested countless hours, energy, and emotion into pursuing your goals. In McKinty’s case, years of hard work, critical acclaim, and a genuine belief in his abilities didn’t prevent him from facing the harsh realities of financial hardship. This is the part of failure that makes it so hard to accept—the sense that your best wasn’t good enough.

But what if failure isn’t an ending? What if it’s just a pause, a moment to reassess, adjust, and gather strength for another attempt? McKinty’s story is a powerful reminder that failure doesn’t have to be final. Sometimes, it’s the step just before success.

Giving Up vs. Pressing On

When faced with failure, the natural response is often to give up. It feels like the simplest solution, especially when continuing on seems too hard, too exhausting, or too uncertain. But quitting comes with its own emotional weight. It often leads to a sense of regret—wondering what could have been had you persisted just a little longer.

McKinty’s decision to quit writing wasn’t taken lightly. He’d tried everything he could think of and still couldn’t make ends meet. When you’re faced with such a stark reality, it’s easy to feel as though giving up is the only option. Yet it’s important to remember that giving up doesn’t remove the desire to succeed—it merely postpones it, leaving you to wonder about the opportunities you may have missed.

Instead of seeing failure as a signal to stop, what if we saw it as a signal to pivot? McKinty’s story shows that sometimes, the key to overcoming failure is asking for help, seeking advice from those who’ve walked the path before you. By reaching out to Don Winslow, McKinty opened the door to a new opportunity he hadn’t even considered. That’s the power of pressing on—you never know what might happen next.

The Importance of Support

A crucial aspect of McKinty’s turnaround was the support he received. Don Winslow didn’t have to respond to McKinty’s letter. He could have ignored it, busy as he was with his own successful career. Yet, Winslow took the time to connect McKinty with his agent, and that small act of kindness set the wheels in motion for McKinty’s eventual success.

This highlights an important lesson: support can make all the difference in someone’s life. Whether you’re the one offering it or the one receiving it, support has the power to change outcomes. For McKinty, the encouragement from Winslow and Salerno gave him the strength to try one last time.

I see this principle in action frequently in my own work as a leadership coach. Every week, I receive emails from people seeking advice—sometimes about their careers, sometimes about specific challenges they’re facing. I always reply because I understand that a small piece of advice or encouragement can be the difference between someone giving up and someone finding the resolve to keep going. Like Winslow did for McKinty, you have the potential to offer someone a lifeline, whether through advice, mentorship, or simply a kind word.

If you find yourself in a position to help someone who’s struggling, I encourage you to reach out. You may not realise just how much your support could mean to them. And if you’re the one in need of support, don’t hesitate to seek it. People are often more willing to help than we imagine.

Your Story Isn’t Over Yet

We’re living in a world that often glorifies overnight success, making it easy to forget that most successes are born out of repeated failures. People like Adrian McKinty remind us that perseverance, resilience, and a willingness to ask for help can turn the tide, even when things seem impossible.

These are challenging times for everyone, but that doesn’t mean we have to stop dreaming. Whether your goal is to become an author, an entrepreneur, a professional coach, or whatever you’re passionate about, remember that failure isn’t the end of the story. Our passions give us purpose—they’re what make life worth living. So don’t discard them too easily. Keep going, even when the road seems long. Your story isn’t over yet.

The next time you face a setback, instead of asking, “Why me?” try asking, “What’s next?” Because you never know—your next chapter could be the one where everything changes.

I’ll leave you with Adrian McKinty’s own words, which sum up his journey perfectly:

“My story is a story of never giving up. It’s a story of writers helping other writers. I hope it inspires others who are thinking about quitting to never give up. I never imagined any of this could happen, but I hoped it would. I had to hope. I am so grateful, and I hope my story inspires others.” — Adrian McKinty

So, if you’re thinking of quitting, give it one last try. You might just surprise yourself with what you’re capable of.